(sketch) Whilst Working the Kitchen

Some nights at work are ridiculously slow... picture a clam, immobile for the most part. that clam thinks those nights are slow. On those types of nights we kitchen us either smoke constantly, read a book/magazine/newspaper, or do a little bit of drawing. For your viewing pleasure I give you share with you the drawings made at work in sketchbook we keep in the back as well as some that were torn from other books to be stuck (usually with sticker that come on the wheels of blue cheese) to the wall.

Chickens Fingers. Piss on Tits. Jane the Cunt. Nuclear logo

The chicken fingers sketch was based on a prank I pulled on a customer who had suggested I do it months earlier. The bar was empty except for a few regulars. The guy orders the chicken fingers and moments before he takes his first bite I run out from the kitchen having covered my amputated arm with ketchup and hot sauce yelling things like "Those aren't chicken fingers!", "Stop don't eat them!" and the such.
My co worker Dustin likes to ear jumpsuits in the kitchen to keep the grease off of his clothes. He also mumbles a lot and has catch phrases like "Shim sham" "gibbledy goo" and his most notable (not just because you can hear what he is saying) is "Piss on tits!" so i took the cue from those truck decals of Calvin from Calvin and Hobbs having Dustin in his jumpsuit pissing on the word tits.
Jane the cunt is a cunt. She took me home from the bar one drunken night only to notice my arm after i took off my coat and sweater. She then made excuses to kick me out of the apartment. A few days later she began a series of text messages explaining why she didn't want to see me anymore. Her reasons started with not wanting to be seen in public with a one armed freak and got worse as the messages arrived. Fucking bitch.
My artist friend Anali Herr was asked by her boyfriend to make a logo for his company that makes speaker cases or something of the sort. After many sketches were all turned down for finicky reasons she called me up to see what i could come up with. I made only the one sketch and was told it was too detailed.

Cave Art. Suzanne. This is Jay

Someone had drawn a horrible rendition of the superman emblem on a ledge on the patio. over the next few weeks, until it finally rained, i would put out my smoke out on the logo and drag the ash through the caulk making a dancing stick figure the likes of which might be found on a cave wall.
Poor Suzanne is oblivious to the fact that she is about to be raped by a flying purple people eater. That's right I said raped.
My friend Jay is a hilarious comedian and part of Uncle Mao and the Red star Review. I was trying to experiment with what I want to call "continuity text." His death is fictional, as is most of the story, but if (and I mean IF) he were bitten by a spider I wouldn't put it past him to think he would receive super powers.

Dracoolia. Connecting Image Orgy. Prep Fridge One Line

Never invite Dracoolia to your party, he will suck the life right out of it. That is both literally and metaphorically. 1st he will bore your guest into a slumber with his stories of "the old country" and how things used to cost much less when he were alive. Once asleep he drains the guest of most of their blood leaving them with killer hang overs. the good thing is as long as you don't invite him in he can't crash your party.

Instead of filling the entire page with stuff I left negative space to be filled in with some random color like, I don't know, navy blue or something. Like with wallpaper the image connects to itself to be a repeated pattern.
I like to do drawings where my pen never leaves the page. I call them oneliners. this is the prep freidge where we keep burger and nacho toppings. also you can see the trash bin, and the edge of the freezer.

Her Name is Bunny

On Thursdays when the new Now magazines come out, my coworker Dustin will look at the sex adds in the back. This sends his already creepy mind further into the gutter. He had drawn a scared bunny (the rabbit) about to be fucked in the ear, so I also drew a scared bunny (the person) about to be violated. She is trapped in a metal box of some sort. That was a strange night.